As you could read in my blog, I prefer to write my story in English. When you read it then (perhaps) you found something wrong with the sentences, maybe these words are coming to your mind “what? What does she talk about? What is she going to say? I really do not understand her story.” Well, I am very sorry. First, I confess that I am not really good in English, especially in written. I found that I meet difficulty in grammar. But I really want to improve my English skill. I have a long and windy road in finding a way to improve my English skill.
When I was in Elementary School to Junior High School, I got an English lesson, but practically I never used it as my second language. I rather studied it to increase my B or A score in my evaluation book (rapor). I joined an English Course, it was in BBC. I was excited in learning but I could not apply it in my everyday life.
When I was in Senior High School, I found my first diary. I wrote it down when I was in Junior High. I read a pages one by one, and I am laughed. In my diary, I wrote something about my feeling to a boy that I like, it was all written by English, but all the sentences are wrong. HAHAHAHA, it so silly but at least I ever try. So I decided to join an English course (again). But frankly, it was all because my closest friends are join it. So, you could guess what, yes I never finish it. No…it was not because my friends are quit. But I did not have enough an extra money to continue my course. At that time, I was thinking that I am already good enough in English skill. *Sounds very confidence*.
Then I was accepted in one of academy in Jakarta. One of the subject is English conversation. As I remember, we had to debate in English. At that time, only one of my friends who is so fluently in English and she so seriously in taking the class. But I have a good memory regarding to English class. At one day in 1998 following a Mei Tragedy, the students who comes from many universities always do a demonstration. It was the beginning of reformation era. At HAM day, it will be held a long march and we all students are invited to join a long march. I was one of the participant. I really want to join it but I have a presentation at that day. So, I said to my teacher about my purpose and want to be the first student who present the topic. The topic was about AIDS. She was agree with the condition that I have to be good in my presentation. The presentation was run smoothly. I really had a confidence on my presentation and I could answer all the questions. Finally, my teacher gave me the permission to leave the class to participate in the long march.
My second employer was Indonesian and the company was also local. So, I decided to join an English course, it was paid by myself because I have a salary. I was taking a communication in Business class not a general English class like one I ever took before. I was thinking that I would have a classmates from other company and they could be better than me in English. When the class begun we did not really learn an English, I and my classmates could get well adapt to each other. We came to the class frequently just because we want to meet each other and go out after the class over. As I remember, I only took for 2 semester, then again I quit because there were no class that suitable with my schedule. But my opportunity to learn an English was not over yet. In my spare time I always read a novel that written in English. I think it was my good habit, I prefer to read to spend my time over in my long way road from my house to the office and vice versa.
So I was excited when I have accepted in Psychology in one of university. Mostly, its module are in English written. I feel like I am smart people :d. Bring a lot of thick books and its all in English written. But, I found that my English is not improving enough, I think it was because I did not use it in my daily conversation. I did not have a confidence to talk in English and I have not got the opportunity to use it everyday. Then, when I was joining in multinational company (my third office) I hope I could have the opportunity. Hehehe, unfortunately, the only ‘bule’ there was my director, and did not have an opportunity to talk to him. I found that many people in my office there are fluently in English. I feel less confidence (again).
Then I have to resign from there and again I was join in local company. But I still look for a multinational company where I could have many opportunity to talk in English. At one time, I had an opportunity to came to the interview, the employer commended me that I have a good English but when it came the written test, I am very sure I am not good enough, because I was not pass the test. Recently, I was being interviewed with expatriate, it was not the first time that I have to be interviewed by expat, but in the middle of my self confidence crisis I really need some commendation. So, when he said that my English is very good for the one who never use it in everyday life, I am very proud of myself hahahaha. But I still need an improving, I have to be hired in multinational company and have a chances to travel abroad. While I am waiting for ‘my luck’, I will improve it with my own way. One of my effort is pushing my self in writing my blog in English. Enjoy it! 🙂